You’re planning a wedding and there’s a million and one things to think about, most of which you’d never even heard of before you got engaged. Next on the list is “Should we book a wedding celebrant or a registrar for our ceremony?”
Given that you might not have been to that many weddings in your life, and you’ve probably never been to a celebrant wedding, this can be a tricky question to answer. If you don’t know where to start when picking who will lead your wedding ceremony, don’t worry because friends, I’ve got you.
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As an experienced wedding celebrant, I’ve worked in the wedding industry for years and have guided lots of couples through their ceremony planning process. Almost everyone I’ve worked with has had both a celebrant wedding AND a registrar led civil ceremony too – You’ll see why below – Basically, this means I can give pretty good insight from both sides.
In this article I lay out what a wedding celebrant is and what they do, compared to what a registrar is, along with what your wedding will be like with each option.
Roles and responsibilities of a wedding celebrant
The role of a wedding celebrant is to host ceremony all about you as a couple. They do this by getting to know you and asking all the right questions to truly personalise your ceremony script. On your wedding day itself your celebrant will prioritise you and won’t be rushing off to another place to marry anyone else.
Here’s what else you get with a celebrant…
1 – Choosing who you want to marry you
You get to choose the specific celebrant who will marry you and meet them ahead of time too, so you can decide if they’re the type of person you want at your wedding.
Let me add a disclaimer at this point: Clearly, it’s crucial that you pick the right celebrant for you.
In this article I’ve detailed all the magical superstar qualities which I hope I have, and I know lots of wonderful celebrants share too but I can’t vouch for every celebrant that exists. You really are in the power position though, because you can work with whoever you want (which you’ll see below is different than with registrars) so you can ensure there’s a good personality match.
2 – Enjoying the planning experience
When you work with a celebrant the process of planning the ceremony becomes part of your wedding experience. You get to input your ideas and include what’s important to you, so your ceremony becomes super personal and memorable. It won’t be about the institution of marriage, it will be about you.
3 - Inclusive Ceremonies
Celebrants are skilled at blending different traditions and cultures and can be more flexible than is possible in the legal setting of a registrar’s civil ceremony. Personally, I build in opportunities to talk about inclusion and accessibility as we get to know one another.
Your celebrant should respect your preferences and needs, and you should be empowered to expect this. Because you’re crafting your ceremony together, it can reflect who you really are rather than being too traditional or formal.
With your chosen celebrant at the helm of your wedding ceremony ship, you will be able to rock up on the day knowing that they have everything under control. They know what atmosphere you want your celebration to have, and you can relax because they’re going to create this for you and your guests.
4 - Legalities of a celebrant wedding
Sounds good so far, right? There’s one more thing you need to be aware of. When you opt to have a wedding celebrant marry you, you need to organise the legal marriage paperwork separately. (As your celebrant I can help though, it’s very easy.)
To become legally married you will need to do some paperwork separately with the council. The easiest way to do this is to have a small civil ceremony at your local registry office. Usually, councils refer to this as a “statutory ceremony” and it’s a very low key event.
How is a registrar different to a celebrant?
A registrar’s job is to conduct a civil marriage ceremony. They are employed by the local authority and in official terms “registrars collect and record details of all births, deaths, marriages and civil partnerships”*.
It doesn’t sound like an incredibly romantic job, but if you want your marriage to be legally authorised, you will certainly meet a registrar. Even if you choose to have a celebrant wedding for your main celebration, when you do your paperwork at the council it will be a registrar who oversees this for you.
*According to the Government’s General Register Office website.
Let’s have a look at the other need-to-knows about registrars…
1 – Allocated not chosen
The key distinction between a wedding celebrant and a registrar is that you do not get to choose your registrar. Because they work for the council, all enquiries go through the Register Office and you will be allocated someone to marry you (usually based on geographical areas).
It is extremely rare that you would meet your registrar before your wedding day. Some councils do offer a pre-meet for an additional charge, but you still can’t control who that person is.
Naturally I’m a celebrant and I advocate for couples to have choice about how they celebrate their weddings. BUT whist I’m not a massive cheerleader for registrars, I absolutely respect what a tough gig they have. They are typically rushing between multiple ceremonies each day and they don’t have the time to get to know the couples they’re marrying.
2 - Standard ceremony wording
Creatively registrars only say set scripted words in their ceremonies, so there is very little chance for couples to add personalisation. You can normally add readings, music and vows but otherwise the content is very structured.
The major plus point to a civil ceremony with a registrar is that they can sign the legal paperwork with you then and there.
Registrars follow a set script that covers all the legal requirements. This means the ceremony is straightforward and to the point, generally lasting up to 15 minutes. It’s not as personal as a celebrant-led ceremony, however it gets the job done.
3 - Limited to licensed venues
One thing to keep in mind is that registrars can only officiate at licensed venues like registry offices, town halls, and certain approved locations. If your venue has the correct permissions then there’s no problem, but if you’re dreaming of an unconventional venue or a ceremony outdoors a registrar might not be able to accommodate that.
Choosing between a celebrant and a registrar
Gosh, there’s a lot to consider when choosing between a wedding celebrant and a registrar for your main celebration. Whatever you settle on there’s no wrong answer! There’s far too much pressure to have the perfect wedding (what’s so good about perfect anyway?) so I won't add my opinion to the noise you're coping with.
I love talking about weddings so if you need a friendly person to chat through your options, drop me a message and we can arrange a call. I promise I won’t pressure you to book, we can just talk about how to make your ceremony the best bit of your day.
Key facts about a celebrant:
You book them directly.
You choose based on personality and experience offered.
Planning the ceremony is all about you as a unique couple.
Your ceremony is highly personalised, with your story, values, hopes for the future and things that are important to you
Ceremony lasts roughly 25-40 minutes depending on content.
There are no legal words to say, because you are not signing the marriage paperwork at this point.
A celebrant wedding is for you if…
If you want to enjoy the process of planning the ceremony. If you want your ceremony to have a special atmosphere for guests. If you’re the kind of people who don’t like being told what to do.
Key facts about a registrar:
You book them through the council.
Do not choose a specific person, they are allocated to you.
Planning the ceremony involves choosing from template options in a booklet.
Your ceremony is personalised only by choice of readings, music and vows.
Ceremony lasts no longer than 15 minutes.
There are some legal words to say, ultimately because you are signing the marriage paperwork then and there.
A registrar wedding is for you if…
If you want the ceremony to be over quickly. If you’d like to narrow down how many decisions you will make. If you’re the kind of people who prefer structure and formality.
Huge appreciation to Nick and Naomi for kindly allowing me to share this beautiful photos from their celebrant wedding ceremony. It was a glorious summer tipi wedding with colourful pinwheels and so much laughter. Full photography credit goes to Salsabil Morrison Photography.
If, after reading this, you are well and truly sold on the idea of a celebrant wedding then do get in touch. I'd love to be your celebrant! You might be interested in the blog posts below too, check them out.